The Science of K-Pop

teamgrouphug asked: Ooh girl. Enlighten me on your scientific ways. I've been wasting my li--- Uh. I mean listening to this shit for nearly a decade. And I still can't figure out half of this shit. lmao

Brah, I can try, to spread the word of the Korean Pop gospel lol, to spread the… “knowledge”.
But yo, I don’t think anyone can fully figure this shit out, the leaders and creators of K-Pop probably can’t fully figure this shit out hehehe

graci3 asked: haha this isn't a question, i just want to say i love your posts. your cross-outs are hilarious. keep it up =)

*coughs*abajillionyearslatersorryaboutthat*coughs* Thanks :) though I haven’t really been, sorry about that, but there’s… things and yeah :P Thank you though, it means a lot to get a message.

Anonymous asked: what groups are you into? just wondering because you seem to only post big bang and 2pm stuff :)

Although Big Bang is my main bias…
I generally listen to them, SHINee, Epik High, 2NE1, a bit of SNSD, After School and B2ST haha, but I’ve liked at least one song by just about every group I’ve heard :P and yes, a few 2PM songs as well are thrown in there :P

letmetellyah asked: <3 your tumblr. Just thought i'd let you know. (:

Thank you for letting me know xD It’s really nice to hear :)

My teeth hurt.

My stomach feels like it does by three in the morning on Halloween.

I just fell into a diabetic coma. I mean FURRY PAWS? Cheez-itz.

That’s both cute and a bonus for furries.

Oh snap! Wrong group…

There… that uh… that saves me some eyebleaching procedures.

Why does this sell? Why do we buy into these deadly cute things? You know, the ones you want to strangle and kick and beat half to death because they’re so cute.

Should I even bother to explain why they’re all this cute? I mean it’s obvious right. I hate genetics sometimes.

But it’s not all genetics, yes, you too, but not that loser behind you, YOU can master the ability to send people to the hospital with just the slightest giggle, or pose, or just by… just… being.

It’s possible. I swear.

It’s called, make-up and plastic surgery!

Nah, I’m kidding. It’s how you carry yourself. Look at them, study these girls.

…Sure, maybe they are at the advantage of being super-cute naturally stupid annoying…

All jealousy issues aside!

But, it takes practice too.

Even more than their abundance in cute clothes at the ready, it’s what’s underneath that counts right? …Actually, it’s completely the surface. That’s where it all counts. The surface. But that’s okay, because eventually they get old and cracked and wrinkly.

Well, inside, step one:

Surround yourself with cute things. I’m talking bunnies, baby ducks, chicks (of the bird family, not like hot lady friends… but if they’re cute too that might work, just make sure they’re not cuter than you), and everything Asian.

Don’t forget the music. Cute music makes you seem cute and makes you feel cute, and then you start acting cute. Because I typed so.

…Please don’t listen to any of this BS that I sprout.

Step Two: The make-up. Don’t we all want to look like an anime character with eyes that in proportion to the rest of the face are like the eyes of a fly? ‘Cause we all know flies are sexy. Damn sexy.

I mean like Whoa.

Step Three: The poses baby.

Bby, you better master the poses of this fine art. You’ll fail if you don’t. Really. Everyone will think you’re super cute and then BAM! It’s picture time.

And you don’t live up to their expectations, any of them.

And then you look as stupid as TOP trying to dance all sexy-like.

Give up. Please.

For your sake, and mine.

Because DAMN,

it sucks to be you.

So… if you follow all these steps, and they work,

Hit me up because I will fall off my bed in shock.

And that shit’s a bunk-bed.

Were talking broken limbs here people.

And broken limbs aren’t funny.

…When they’re your own.

Birth Name: Kwon Ji Yong 컨 지용.

Birth Date: August 18th, 1988. 08/18/88.

Notes: Lady Gaga’s Soul Twin.

For all the furries out there.

G-Dragon, often shortened to GD, needs no introduction.

‘Cause he’s G-Dragon.

And that means he’s the leader of Big Bang.

And bitch, if you don’t know who Big Bang is yet…

Leave. Just leave.

And Google the word “AMAZING”. Actually… just Google any of the following, SEX(Y), HOT, RETARDED, GANGSTA MOFOS, AWESOME, etc. And they should show up… albeit, a few other K-Pop groups might as well.

Now, do you have a picture of them? Yes?

Well I’m posting one anyways for the lazy asses out there like me.

There.

You see them.

Now see the tiny guy?

No, not Tae Yang, he can’t help it if he’s short. Besides… he’s not… TINY in other ways.

No you perverts, I meant his guns. I mean DAMN. LOOK at those things! All three of them.

But that’s not the point of this post, the point of this post is G-Dragon.

The stick thing.

You know, the female?

Yeah. Now you found it him.

So, now that you have found Lady Gaga G-Dragon… Are you attracted to him? Does he make you randy baby, yeah?

Bitch, just as Nichkhun is a sneaky bastard so is GD is going to get you now or later. Choose quickly and give up hope.

He’s nowhere near my type, but every so often, those days of past, where my lust love for him ran rampant and roamed free, come heat-seeking-torpedoing back at me and BAM.

I’m up on this boy again.

He looks like a pretty girl, he’s a tiny, little man, and he’s nearly anorexic.

SO WHY IS HE SO GODDAMN SEXY?!

SO WHY IS HE SO GODDAMN CUTE?!

Well, after a year of dedicated research, cough, a little over a year of listening to K-Pop, cough, I have only a few conclusions I can draw up upon this mystery of a ManWoman.

His swagger. And the hustle of a champion.

Give him anything, ANYTHING, and he’ll work it.

What other man do you know that can rock out a pink jumpsuit decked out with toys and still look smokin’ ?

I’ll assume there’s a silence following and just say, exactly.

If anyone else wore that, they’d just… well… it wouldn’t be quite so pretty.

Literally.

With this boy’s talent at pulling things off, his swagger, he can be sexy as fuck one minute, to the cutest thing the next.

So how can you have his swagger?

Hit up Billy Mays in the afterlife. He can sell it to you. Please RIP Billy Mays. I love you and will never forget all those wonderful times you yelled your heart out at me to buy things.

And that’s the nice way of saying, you can’t have his swagger. Unless you have a séance.

G-Dragon’s swagger is his, and nobody else can have it. Don’t try to compare this boy, just stop.

Seriously. He’s a psychopath. He’ll kill you.

We all saw how much fun he had in “She’s Gone”. And he was still sexy, uhm, let me please say, What. The. Fuck?!

Now the science behind his swagger you may ask?

He’s magical. Legitimately magical. He’s actually part Leprechaun. His swagger is made up of stardust and unicorn tears.

So back to the initial question, why is this man so attractive?

I’ll say it again, his swagger.

His cocky, but just the right, HOT, amount of it, attitude. His fun, playful side. His crazy, I’m-Senile-WAY-Before-My-Time side. His dorky side. His naming-the-people-on-his-bedsheets-Tom-and-Laura side.

His… Him.

G-Dragon is an endless mystery. A venture into the great, GREAT, unknown. If someone ever reaches him, he ain’t not giant leap for mankind, he’s a fucking rocket ship across the galaxy for mankind.

So let’s appreciate his… ways.

———-

*Note: I make fun of G-Dragon in this, but honestly, the more I make of someone, the more I love that person. It’s my way of showing affection. I like to tease people. This post is by no means meant to insult him.

 There is definitely a line that can be crossed, and that line is different for everyone.

So for future references in posts, if I’m making fun of the person, the only chance there is, is that I actually think they’re amazing.